Key differentiations
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Contents
Differentiations about the four part model
- Observation vs. Evaluation
- Feeling vs. Thought
- Need vs. Strategy or request
- Request vs. Demand
- Persisting vs. Demanding
Differentiations about empathy
- Being giraffe vs. Doing giraffe
- Empathy vs. Sympathy
- Empathy vs. Advice
- Empathy vs. Analysis
- Empathy vs. Reassurance
- Empathy vs. Storytelling
- Guessing vs. Knowing
- Empathic sensing vs. Intellectual guessing
- Ten non-empathic forms: advising, one-upping, educating, consoling, story telling, shutting down, sympathising, interrogating, explaining, correcting (see the nvc book).
Jackal/Giraffe differentiations
- Power-with vs. Power-over
- Choice vs. Submission or rebellion
- Interdependence vs. Dependence or independence
- Giraffe honesty vs. Jackal honesty
- Protective use of force vs. Punitive use of force
- Appreciation vs. Approval, compliments or praise
- Value judgment vs. Moralistic judgment
- Life-connected vs. Life-alienated
- Shift vs. Compromise
- Respect for authority vs. Fear of authority
- Vulnerability vs. Weakness
- Self-empathy vs. Acting out, repressing, or wallowing
- Being nice vs. Giraffe
